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Season Wrap-up

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 I couldn't find it in me this week to write a breakdown of this weeks games since the season had wrapped up as of Tuesday, but it occurred to me that a summary of each teams performance might be useful to those who could be invited to play in next years FFL.  Here is a brief summary of each teams season starting from the zero to the hero.  Ranking is based on Final Standing Projections.  I hope you enjoy it. 12) Team Broundon (I Got TheGaryOnLock) There are absolutely no redeeming qualities that can be pinpointed about this shit-show.  The Broundons started off with what looked like a high school football team who forgot their cleats for an away game, and ended up looking like the cheerleading squad finished the match for them.  The owner for this team should feel ashamed that he was even considered for a serious league as he showed absolutely no skill whatsoever from the draft all the way into the final matchup.  I would say that he should do some re...
 Alert Newsletter. I feel as though with the current climate in the Findlay Fantasy League it is imperative at this point to look at all sides of the issues that may be facing all of you during the approach to the post season matchups.  In everyone's interest there needs to be an unfortunately hasty decision made so as not to see the dissolve of the entire league.  I have been approached by several members of the FFL in regards to this seasons alleged collusion.  Keep in mind, if these allegations are found to be unwarranted, we can all agree to start fresh next season with rules agreed upon by ALL before the season starts.  In the meantime, the newly formed FFL Players Union (hereinafter referred to as the U), have asked me (hereinafter referred to as Brutal Union President) to lead a full investigation into these allegations.  Since I have proven to be an impartial onlooker to this years FFL season, I more than humbly accepted the offer.  Here are th...

Week 12

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  Well, well, well, things certainly are getting interesting in the FFL.  This weeks games didn't settle much other than that the Whiskey Drinkers are in a shit division and really don't deserve the credit they are getting.  The race for second place is still on with some upsets and come from behinds, (not the good kind).  Let's see if there is anything good to report in THIS WEEKS BREAKDOWN!!! I Got TheGaryOnLock VS Huge Fuzzyballs It's pretty obvious that the team formerly known as the Broundons can't escape the shame of getting last place this year.  It's been no ups and all downs for this team.  Watching the absolutly embarrassing season these guys have had is like watching a race in the Paralympics where one guys prosthetic fell off at the beginning of the race.  It's just really sad. Huge Fuzzyballs should feel absolutely no pride in defeating a team as bad as the Gary's.  The Balls are starting to resemble a downs syndrome dog that licks it...
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 Week 11 There was certainly some "by the chinny chin chin" this week.  Some of these games showed promise for upsets, but to no avail.  Interesting to say the least, as I mulled over the race for second place.  There is for sure some funny business going on in the dealership with some of the owners pulling out all the stops to try to secure a playoff spot.  Keep the unfair trades being proposed in check by making sure to veto trades that look like rape.  Keep an eye on Brandon, it appears as though he will take the dick from anyone to secure the Gary.  If you are part of the Bullshit, go suck a dick!  Week 11 Breakdown:                                                    Team Mayo DeMaio VS Huge Fuzzyballs Team Mayo got the upset this week against a wounded Fuzzyballs team even without the big n...
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 Week 10 I remember a kid in middle school, (let's call him Bris Prett) who came running out of his last period class, jumping up and down with excitement yelling about his victory that week.  When asked why he was so excited, the puny lad proclaimed that the bully who normally stole his lunch money had stayed home sick that day.  I really don't need to explain that we all just felt sorry for the boy, since he had not really WON anything, he just got lucky and dodged a bullet.  Ah, the memories of childhood...  Week 10 Breakdown: Huge Fuzzyballs VS North Idaho Lone Wolf Huge Fuzzyballs fell this week at probably the worst time to fail, at any one game, from now until the end of the season.  The affliction of ADD finally caught up to this teams owner, and not paying attention didn't pay off for the first time in a while.  It might be good to take some Ritalin and try to get it together soon, or the playoffs might elude you while you chase a squirrel. Gi...

Week 9

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It is clear that some of us know how Fantasy Football is played, and some of us don't.  Most notably, Bear Down and MaT Ice are great examples of how to completely turn a team around mid season by picking up entirely new teams.  Fresh Prince also deserves accolades for cheating as the commish (even though it really isn't working out for him.)  The losers at having common sense, just hold on to hope that starting quarterbacks will somehow score 100 points a game.  Sorry Mayo and Broundon, won't happen, the rest of your team matters too.  Week 9 breakdown: Fresh Prince of Helaire VS Huge Fuzzyballs The Fresh Prince continued his ass pounding this week, looking like a trailer park tenant who can't afford the rent getting railed by the landlord.  It's sad to see the failure that this team has come to be, literally begging for mercy this week as he faces the Brutal Master.  No amount of groveling will help this owners poor soul as the Master will own you....
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  The eighth week of FFL didn't hold many surprises.  Winners continue to win, and losers just keep on losing.  While counting votes in Georgia, it occurred to me that at the end of the day, we all come out winners during this outstanding second season of our league.  Unless you're owners of Team Broundon, Huge Fuzzyballs, or Hotrodda rodda.  Then...you are a loser....because you didn't try.  Here's the Week 8 Breakdown! Huge Fuzzyballs VS Whiskey Drinkers Kinda seems like the Fuzzyballs might be kissing some proverbial ass this week, since no one on the planet could have made more terrible starting decisions than this teams owner.  Throwing a game on purpose isn't looked on kindly in this dealership you apple polishing bonehead.  Acting surprised that your baby came out black when your wife's best friend is Kanye West isn't fooling anyone. Whiskey Drinkers coach watched this game from the booth this week, and it showed.  He doesn't realize t...